There's never a right time in the annual calendar to end a relationship. Christmas is days away followed by New Year's Eve, followed by Valentine's Day. The annual two week holiday to Lesvos is booked for Spring, friend's are getting civil partnered in Summer (so you don't want to overshadow their happiness) and at some point there are each others birthday's, not to mention whatever circumstances life might be throwing at you as individuals. No there's really never a good time.
Today I helped a friend move out and on from her relationship. Driving back in the car loaded up with her belongings, our melancholy thoughts permeated the car's atmosphere.
"It was the right thing to do" she affirms to herself, trying to relieve the guilt. "I just couldn't carry on ignoring our differences - that would have been wrong to do, to lie that all is still ok."
We share experiences about our relationships past and present, regrets, resentment, disappointments, hindsight we've learned from, the broken hearts that healed.
As we talk, the Christmas spirit passes us by; mini santa's dangling from walls, sparkly lights draped around doorways and brightly decorated tree's standing proud in windows.
"Relationships are fragile like Christmas bauble's" I pitch in. "As two individuals you will always have differences in a relationship. It's how much you are able and willing to accept those differences and compromise to enable the relationship to work. But the relationship is continually under threat from external and internal forces that challenge those differences and the compromises made. What might have once been a difference that was OK with you, isn't anymore".
People think of relationships as something that are strong - may be because they have such trust and confidence in their partners - 'their rock'. But my experience is they're just as easy to break as a Christmas bauble.
