The new lesbian Uniform

At the weekend, I headed off to Manchester Pride with some mates of mine. A group of girlz eager to sample the delights of the north. I packed just about my entire wardrobe for the occasion, to cover all eventualities and weather that might present itself.  I’m wearing my usual attire: Levi jeans, adidas trainers, Lazy lady belt and Roxy hoodie.

At the allocated rendezvous meeting point for us all to get the coach together, K shows up in her black Superdry jacket. She is equally dressed in casual brand wear. I tell K that I have packed and intend to wear the same Superdry jacket, only mine is white. Her response makes me think.


“I don’t care. It’s practically the lesbian uniform. There will be hundreds of lesbians there, all wearing the same jacket, all wearing the same clothes.”

Looking round at the other girls in my party, I see she has a point. Superdry and Bench are the brands of lesbian choice it seems. I ask them about the clothes they’ve packed and the brands they’ll adorn. Between us we could open our own branch of TK Maxx: Superdry, Bench, Quicksilver, Levi, Plain Lazy, Paul Frank, Roxy, Storm, Nike, Adidas, SoulCal, Breed, Diesel…and on the fringe, New Balance.

Once upon a time, a dyke could be easily identified by her short hair, Doc Martens and boyish style. But as the butch stereotype has been replaced by long haired, make-up wearing femmes, a new identity of lesbian has emerged, recognisable by the branded clothes she wears.

Spot the brands I'm wearing!

It’s not so much about wearing a brand itself. We’ll all happily admit to wearing Primark and Asda George, but it is about the style that these brands have captured that appeals to the lesbian wearer. This in turn means that to fit in and be ‘cool and trendy’, you’ve got to wear the brand.

On route to Manchester and it’s easy to identify the other gay girls on the coach, just because like my party, they too, are sporting the brands that are popular. It’s not a token gesture either.  Girlz are head to toe in the ‘look’,  from their shoes to their jeans, belts to underwear, jewelery, watches and even accessories.

Add to this, the second classic give-away of hands in pockets, and walking down the street, your gaydar need never be broken again! Straight women just don’t do it! Yet gay girls will stand or walk, hands in pockets of jackets or trousers wherever and whenever. K demonstrates my point at the motorway service stop, getting frustrated at her trousers. “I’m trying to put my hands in pockets that aren’t even there!”


Saturday night and we head off to Canal Street to join the Pride festivities. K and myself are having a ‘pant-off’ competition, where random girls in the gay village will be asked to cast their votes on the best pants. A random exercise concocted by our mates, one drunken night prior to our trip. I brought my sparkling Calvin Klein pair to dazzle the girls with, whilst K decided upon classic and British 'Jack Wills'. Who will win? Ultimately, it won’t be about the colour, the design, the fit, or the glitter. It will be about the brand and who therefore is perceived as the coolest lesbian. 

We pose hands in pockets and shirts lifted ready for the pant-off to begin. Suddenly L from our group, whose pants are usually kept well hidden, jumps in next to us and pulls up her pant band to join the competition; ‘Pants to Poverty’.  K and myself look at each other for we knew immediately we’d both just lost. ‘Cool and ethical branding’, lesbian chic at it’s best.