It's no wonder lesbian couples don't go out much and suffer from lesbian bed death; too busy depressing each other with an incessant analysis of their relationship, each other, emotions and feelings. Every mineute detail covered until you’ve both exhausted yourselves and just want to go to sleep, or it’s escalated into an argument but which neither of you are now completely sure what about.
It drove me crazy in my last relationship. Talking about every intsy winsy thing until, just like matter under a microscope, as you look closer and closer all that’s left is air and a feeling of emptiness and space. As the article points out, ‘this kind of endless verbosity is so boring and passion-numbing that you risk ending up as friends rather than lovers’. How many lesbian couples do we know that break up because ‘they’ve become friends’.
Even in Sex and the City (Season 4, Episode 5) Samantha experiences the frustration of this with Maria, her girlfriend. She first mentions it in the bath, “All we ever do is lie in the bath and talk about feelings.” Her annoyance grows when they go out and Maria insists on more verbal expression from Samantha,
Why have you not told these nobody that you are with somebody now?
What am I supposed to say? "Hi, this is my lesbian lover. PS, I'm done with dick?"
Who said anything about dick? - I was talking about our relationship.
Of course you were.
Do you miss the dick? Is that what this is all about? It's OK to tell me. We should talk about this.
More talking?!
OK. I'll talk- How many men have you been with? - How many women have you been with?
Why are we even talking about this?
Why are you so afraid to talk?
Finally Samantha, bored and frustrated with all the talking replacing their once exciting sexual activity has had enough.
Samantha, I’m with you on this one.
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